As If For The First Time.

I saw you in my meditation this morning and I was in awe. I guess you would say I have come to a new and deeper level of individuation. I saw you and I saw the wonder of you. You, so beautiful and free. You, separate and magical. You, different and yet the same.

I saw the exquisiteness of you.

Your eyes deep and intense, yet soft and filled with excitement and love. Your skin so smooth and with a fragrance that is exquisitely you. Your hair, rich in colour and so beautifully thick and full. Your voice, deep and melodious, how it calms me just remembering the sound of you.

Who are you I wonder? What magic are you? We breathe the same air and yet your breath becomes part of your body separate and different from me.

You smile and I wonder what brings the smile to your face. What is it that has been moved in you? What ignited the joy in your face? How do you experience me so very not you?

How you think and process is uniquely yours. I know it and sense the wonder of it as well as the slight pang of separateness and it causes me to brace at the distance and I have to ground myself back into me.

I realize how much I love you, the richness I gain from you being in my life.

I sense the energy of your being and how different it is from mine. Yours is strong and grounded, expansive and full of joy. There is depth to your masculinity.

I am curious about you. It is not the curiosity of a new love, it is deeper. I wonder what it is like to be you. How is it you see the world so differently than I do. I know you can’t understand me at times and I wonder how you process it and still stay? How it is you exude such confidence? How are you so sure of yourself and your beliefs?

I wonder what you think about your purpose in life or even if you do ponder it. What causes you pain and how have I contributed to it, or do I?

When you wake in the morning what is it like to be you? What crosses your mind in the early light? What brings you joy? What nurtures your spirit?

I am overwhelmed with curiosity about who you are and what you are. It is similar to my experience as I held my daughter for the first time after her birth. I had known her intimately for nine months and yet here she was in my arms, a separate little being. I was filled with awe, wonder and curiosity.

I feel the same about you today. I have known you for years and I am now seeing you differently. It is as if seeing you for the first time. You, as a separate magical being, you so exquisite and beautiful, and I am again filled with love and wonder.